This week has been life changing. Nothing big happened in my day to day activities per say, but my lifestyle and my priorities sure have. As you know, I've been trying to raise money for my trip and it has been less than fruitful so far, but this week I realized why....
For a couple months I have had "Obedience leads to righteousness" running through my head, almost on a daily basis. Sometimes I've wondered why I don't feel so close to God. I love Him, I serve Him but at times have felt unconnected. I can think back to my teen years where I felt the Holy Spirit all the time. Any time I called on the Holy Spirit He filled me immediatly. I know there will be times that you feel closer and times you feel less closer to God, ebbs and flows and all....but I longed for it. And couldn't figure out why it wasn't happening. Sometime last week it was like a lightbuld was turned on. Obedience leads to righteousness and I have not been obedient. And God hears the prayers of the righteous, but I wasn't exactly doing my part. So I decided it was time to set myself apart from the rest of the world. As a Christian I know that we are in this world, but not of this world. But my actions and the way I've been living my life....it might be hard for someone to know that I am different. I am a Christian. I want my life to reflect my beliefs. I want to be the same person in church as I am with my friends. And honesty time - I haven't always been. But I'm ready.
I've already starting making some changes and I feel different. Guess what? I can feel the Holy Spirit again and I can hear God better too.
One thing God has put on my heart is REALLY trusting in him.....starting with my finances. I tithe, but not always regularly. I tithe through Watoto, K-love and the occasional offereing, if I remember to bring cash or have a check with me. But giving until it hurts was not something I've been doing, that's for sure. If I want to trust God that all of this is going to come together in the end, I had better do my part in giving back to Him. I set up automatic weekly tithing with both of my churches. This way I don't have to remember cash or checks. Giving to God WILL happen weekly this way. I also wanted to give to God first. SO often we do our bills and see what we have left...out of what I have left, what can I give to God? Well this way, He gets it first. And that's the way it should be. That's what we are called to do.
Some people might think I'm crazy that while I am saving money and not spending like I used too, I am giving away way more than I ever have, and that's okay. I feel really good about it.
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